There are Movers Who Shake and Shakers Who Cannot Move


While conducting this personal social experiment (that could be an oxymoron), I have learned something very important about myself. I’ve had a sneaking suspicion of this self-factoid most of my life, like the fact that,  in middle school, I began keeping every birthday  card and letter I was given in a yellow cardboard Hecht’s box and only just sorted them and put them into something more permanent last year when the Hecht’s box disintegrated , or that in college I wrote all of my major term papers the hours before they were due. You are probably thinking that my personal epiphany was that I am lazy, and this is a popular conclusion with people I am close to, but no. My layers are more intricate than that. My revelation has been this: I tend to not do things, unless they are absolutely necessary.

While cleaning my bike* in my backyard on Friday, I was distracted by the conversation on the other side of the fence. My neighbors are 3 guys and a girl (or 4 guys– I’m not totally sure) who work together at Blockbuster. They are in their late 20’s, had no desire for higher education, and spend their days drinking and smoking something in the backyard to stave off the stress of becoming obsolete as soon as Netflix, Redbox, and Hoolu are finished taking over the world.

This is what I heard:

Guy #1: I would totally have an element in my blood that made me immune to pain.

Guy #2: That’s stupid. I would have the power to go invisible and would use darts with neuro toxins for weapons.

Guy #1 shouts: You are such an eff-tard! The gravity factor in the 9th Vortex would slow your damn darts down, so they wouldn’t be able to pierce paper! Dude. You’re an idiot.

Guy #3: Heh heh. *belch*

Guy #2 mutters: Oh. Yeah. Well, I’d still want to go invisible. And I would totally have an aircraft with a ring of blades around the outside that could cut through steel.

Oh. Now I get why this is so popular with guys. Yeesh. (fansitekits.com)

(They used words like “Stormcatcherising”, “Ugalgamoth”, and other crap I didn’t understand and find too foolish to recant here.)

I shook my REAL head and walked my REAL self, which could feel pain and was visible no matter what, back inside and shut the REAL door. Feeling validated as a totally normal person, I spent a moment classifying those fellas into a category reserved for people who collect thousands of baseball cards and have only been to a handful of games, or who spend hours playing Farmville and have never touched a vegetable attached to a plant in their life. Then, it sort of dawned on me that we all do something similar. That, while I don’t play World of Warcraft (or whatever), do not mend imaginary fences so the pigs don’t get out, nor get heated when discussing things that don’t exist, I do get passionate about the way I want things to be, which is probably the same thing. The things I want, the things this journal is about, are things that don’t exist yet, and it’s up to me to make them real, which is a huge challenge, since, as mentioned, I don’t always take on tasks until they’re imperative in some way.

So, that’s where I am. In need of 3 motives for being kinder, thinner, and published, since personal fulfillment doesn’t seem to turn me on. I’m opening the floor for comments, suggestions, and butt-kicks. Give it to me.

*I was cleaning my bike in the hopes that it’s readiness would get me back on it, since it is a favorite means for exercise and a huge stress-reliever for me. That was Friday. This is Monday. Get the picture?

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12 Comments

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12 responses to “There are Movers Who Shake and Shakers Who Cannot Move

  1. Nathan Gray

    Today I was snooping around on your blog when I wondered, how is the book coming along? Are you still blogging/writing full time?

    • Thanks for snooping! Just did the math today, actually. 22,000 words to go by April 30th, so the book is more than halfway there. I SHOULD write full time, but always manage to distract myself… and I do part time editing and consulting gigs. I should write a post with an update, huh? Is that what you’re saying? I’ll get on it.

  2. Nan

    I think we can be ‘turned on’ by whatever we want. If mental power, will power, whatever you want to call it… I personally like belief, is really powerful, which it is, then you can sink your ‘power’ ability into whatever you want to. Now the act of changing your ‘power’, that’s what can take a jolt, kick, or as the old ad taught us to ‘Just Do It’. It’s a mental thing…which leaves me wondering about me since my mental capacity has, shall we say, wained in the last 2 decades. Ah well, I’m glad I believe in a God that has me in His loving, sovereign and intricate care! Pray about it…:)

  3. Celeste

    ooorrrrrr… you could come work out with me.
    Just sayin’.

  4. This is a great question Abigail… I’m in the same boat. All the things I want are attainable, it’s just a matter of Doing It.

    What helps me sometimes is to think, “When I wake up tomorrow morning, will I totally hate myself for not ____?” And usually the answer is yes. Once I can project my future self into my current thoughts, it goes a long way toward getting things accomplished. My future self is very impatient with my current laziness ;o)

  5. Charissa

    lol – 2 years, huh? I’m in trouble, then!

    • You have willpower, so don’t worry about falling into my pattern. Share some of it, though! 🙂 And keep it up. You are AMAZING!

      • Charissa

        Thanks 😀 but my willpower isn’t as strong as you may think. I make my plans public to make it harder to back out. And I have a whole host of workout partners. I am SO much more likely to follow through when I’m meeting someone for a workout. And by having several people, I don’t put too much of a burden on any one person. Also, if someone cancels, I still have a lot of other things going on during the week. It took me decades to figure out how to work around my weaknesses and my current success is simply the fruit of learning from my past failures.

  6. Charissa

    Sign up for a sprint triathlon! The distances aren’t too long but it will get you training in 3 sports.

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